tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-50312994305182498232024-03-21T18:54:24.378-07:00A Family of 4 Crazy BatsA journal about a our family and how we usually are running around with our heads cut off......it will make you tired just reading it.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.comBlogger51125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-17498559070035987402015-05-04T10:01:00.000-07:002015-05-04T10:01:13.914-07:00The JourneyI believe everyone is on a journey. Some people continuously reinvent themselves, changing paths or directions every once in a while. Some people follow the same road or even follow the leader. I believe in setting your own path. Making your own way through life. Not to say that occasionally you have to play follow the leader or at least take some part of their road. But you should make it your own. And I believe this is true with just about every facet of life. Take for instance my weight loss journey. I don't know how many times I have started the journey, got lost along the way, found myself again, changed paths, succeeded but never crossed the finish line. I can pretty much say this about every avenue about my life. Not many regrets, but there are some so we must we live and learn.<br />
<br />
So here I go again, starting a new journey. Not "new" in the term of never done before but more of a reinvention journey. I was perusing the blog world and I came across a sentence that made me go hmmm. <i>"the weight loss defeats you’ve experienced in the past are not failures
at all. They’re the lessons you needed to learn in order to succeed this
time! Now you know what doesn’t work and you’ll understand better what
will work now. When you believe that you can be successful at weight
loss (because it makes sense) you’ll lose the weight. It sounds too
simple, I know, but it’s the truth." (<a href="https://getfitover40.wordpress.com/believe-be/" target="_blank">source</a>) </i>This isn't my first rodeo, even my first ride. With both times I lost major weight, there were a few key things that I did, and it worked. One being I counted calories and the other I lifted just as much as I did cardio. OF course the second time I around towards the end of that journey I did more cardio (a lot of cross training) because I was doing races by that time but both journeys had weights involved.<br />
<br />
Both times that major weight loss occurred I had such determination. But I also know in my life no matter how much determination I have, I can sub-comb towards a bottomless pit in a heart beat. I have to keep myself mentally in check. But I truly feel at this particular stage of the game, I feel better mentally and emotionally. Not to say that I don't have my days that I feel like burying myself under the covers or in a bowl of queso. Those are the days I have to watch myself. Those are the days I have to find strength outside myself. And I'm learning to do that.<br />
<br />
LONG TERM GOAL: 150-155<br />
<br />
SHORT TERM GOAL: 2#/wk<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-18622013480740523772014-10-02T10:57:00.001-07:002014-10-02T10:57:30.977-07:0031 days of Opportunities<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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Let's add one more thing to my plate. I'm taking up a challenge to write everyday in October. (<a href="http://www.thenester.com/" target="_blank">The Nester)</a> I'm already supposed to be writing "morning pages" everyday for a class in church that I'm taking. So I may or may not share these pages with you. Or I might pull a certain topic from these pages to discuss. Either way, I'm going to treat each and every day as an opportunity to be in the moment. Rather that moment is being creative, developing my relationship with Jesus, being with my family or whatever the case might be. Everything can be an opportunity.</div>
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<br /></div>
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But may be more importantly is to see if I can do this. I mean don't get me wrong, I really don't want to add one more thing to my plate but I'm intrigued with those that write blogs, especially for a living. I have my handful of blogs I read all the time and some write everyday, some write once a week. And I've always wanted to be consistent in doing writing. So why not give this a whirl. Who knows what could come out of this opportunity. </div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-1684696320895975042014-08-20T08:16:00.000-07:002014-08-20T08:16:19.788-07:00A leap of faith in time<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Salutation"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Date"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Block Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Hyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="FollowedHyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Document Map"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Plain Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="E-mail Signature"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Top of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Bottom of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal (Web)"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Acronym"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Address"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Cite"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Code"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Definition"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Keyboard"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Preformatted"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Sample"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Typewriter"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Variable"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal Table"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="annotation subject"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="No List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Contemporary"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Elegant"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Professional"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Balloon Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Theme"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" QFormat="true"
Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="41" Name="Plain Table 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="42" Name="Plain Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="43" Name="Plain Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="44" Name="Plain Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="45" Name="Plain Table 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="40" Name="Grid Table Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="List Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="List Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="List Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 5"/>
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I saw a hummingbird out my office window this morning. I
watched it while I was on the phone with my boss. Trying to hold the office phone,
juggle my cell phone (so I of course could take a picture) and raise my blinds….but
alas I didn’t capture it. He was a beautiful green little hummingbird. But it
made me smile. It made me think that everything is going to be okay. That while
we might have expenses we weren’t expecting and less hours at jobs, we have
plenty to be thankful for. Watching my little green friend made me celebrate
the success of today and not worry about the stresses of tomorrow. To think
that God created such a little creature that can bring a smile to anyone’s face
when they see one. It is a random creature in this big world. Which is how I
feel today, random.</div>
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<br /></div>
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What if you knew you weren’t doing what you are supposed to
be doing. But changing is difficult and the unknown is scary. So what do you
do?</div>
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<br /></div>
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I’ve got that feeling. I feel like I have a message to
share, to spread to the world like a raging wildfire. So what do I do? How do I
go about it?</div>
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<br /></div>
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Some may say that I need to pray, to ask God for direction.
I’m not a good prayer but I’ve been told no one is. I’ve prayed to God before
about direction. Show me the way, Lord. But maybe I’m too impatient like most,
I want instant answers. But I imagine God doing just like I do with my own
kids, “patience my dear”, “just a minute”. And to God what is time? When will I
get my answers?</div>
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<br /></div>
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I have felt this way before. It comes in waves. There are
several instances where it stands out. One about 5 years ago. I started
simplifying things. Making changes. Which lead me to quit one job and start a
new one. Then I got away from my simplification process and decided I needed
more once again. Decided I had to hold this or that, rather it be job,
position, title etc. And then I get put in my place once again. But I feel unsettled
once again. Like the simplification process needs to ramp up, again.</div>
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<br /></div>
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I could just take a leap of faith. I have faith that all
things work out like they are supposed to. Sometimes the way we want them to
and sometimes not. But in the end they are for the best rather we think they
are. Think about it. If some of the things that didn’t work out worked out like
YOU wanted them to where would you be now? Hmmm? I know I wouldn’t be in the
place I am now. For sure. </div>
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<br /></div>
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Taking a leap of faith is scary. Everyone has to be on board
for it or at least those that it will affect the most. But I don’t think the
world would be what it is today without those that decided to take that leap of
faith. But I have responsibilities too. But maybe my responsibilities need to
have priories placed on them. Are there things I could change? Absolutely. I
have already started making some changes. But I know there are more changes I
could make. And just maybe amongst those changes, reality could take over and
the answer would appear. In time.</div>
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<br /></div>
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I had a dream not too long ago, when I was having a period
of time that I felt unsettled. I don’t remember the dream except for what woke
me up. In a whisper I heard, be still. Go ahead have goose bumps. I felt so
strange after that. And it hasn’t left my mind. Be still. It’s hard. But maybe
if I take the time to be still I will find the answers I need. In time. </div>
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<br /></div>
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For now, I will live purposefully. I will listen to the wind,
feel the sun on my face, watch for my friend the hummingbird and I will try to
marvel at God’s beauty in everything. </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-87549640394617480892014-08-15T08:50:00.000-07:002014-08-15T08:50:09.932-07:00Learning as I get Older<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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I’m learning to say no. I’m learning to say enough is enough
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I said enough. I’ve always been the one that would go out of my way to help
with something no matter what. I volunteered first. I had to have control. I
had to be the one doing it, doing everything. You need a homeroom Mom that’s me,
you need someone to run your committee that’s me! I had to be large and in
charge. Serving others is a gift of mine. But I can take it over the top at times.</div>
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<br /></div>
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This got me a reputation of “the know it all” the aggressive
person that very few people wanted to be around. I wanted to be the boss and I
acted that way but I wanted you to like me too. I’ve battled what people think
all my life. Trying to please everyone. Make everyone happy. And it has cost
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Recently, I’ve been taking a step back. You could say as I’ve
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the quiet, timid, in the background person. I’m beginning to realize that you
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the “go to” person without all the hoopla that I just don’t have time for any
more. </div>
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But it isn’t easy to step back and just do. To step back and
not be the one making the decisions. Rather I’m the one cleaning up after an
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There is another part to this. I’m learning to say no to
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everyone else is doing. I’m not following the crowd because I want to be part
of the party. I’m doing what I want to do, what is important to me. I’m
learning to slow down, smell the roses parse, notice the sunrise, the sunset,
the moon. I’m spending time with my hubby in the mornings reading the paper,
drinking a cup of coffee. Dreaming again of what we want as a family and what I
want as an individual. All the other stuff isn’t as important. In the end it
just won’t matter.</div>
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So I’m learning to say no, I’m learning to let go.</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-76482359973862837472014-08-06T08:48:00.003-07:002014-08-06T08:48:19.391-07:00The Crazy Bats Return<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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I hadn’t realized that I haven’t posted anything in a VERY
LONG TIME. I apologize for that. Life is busy. I know I’m speaking to the
choir, right? Life is a roller coaster and at times these past several months I
have just been along for the ride. Coasting, not really participating. But that
is changing. I’m making a comeback, I am returning to my true self. Not my old
self because I wasn’t always happy with my old self. So there might be a lot of
changes and I’m sure I will make changes to those changes. But I hope you join
me in this ride because I predict it to a great one!</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-24521461749792305202013-12-17T09:36:00.001-08:002013-12-17T09:36:40.299-08:00The Delusion of Illusions......<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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Illusions….magicians are great at this. It is what magic is
all about.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Part of the definition of
illusion is <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><u>deception</u></i>. I’ve
never thought of it as a deception. But think about it, you have this grand
illusion or expectation of what something should be and then it usually, most
of the time doesn’t quite work out to be the illusion we had had envisioned or
it was a total flop. Yet we keep wanting the illusion, we get excited picturing
it, dreaming about it, trying to make it happen with all our might. Then bam,
realization hits or you have aha moment and your bubble is busted. Your
illusion is never going to happen. The below summary really nails it:</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 31.5pt;">
<span class="sectionlabel3"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Synonyms</span>
</span><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;"><br />
</span><span class="sectionlabel3"><span id="hotword"><span style="font-size: 8.0pt; font-weight: normal; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="cursor: default;">1. aberration,
fantasy, chimera. <span style="font-variant: small-caps;">illusion,
hallucination, <u>DELUSION refer</u></span><u> to false perceptions or ideas</u>.
An <span style="font-variant: small-caps;">illusion </span>is a false mental
image produced by misinterpretation of things that actually exist: A mirage is
an illusion produced by reflection of light against the sky. A <span style="font-variant: small-caps;">hallucination </span>is a perception of a thing
or quality that has no physical counterpart: Under the influence of LSD, Terry
had hallucinations that the living-room floor was rippling. <u>A <span style="font-variant: small-caps;">delusion </span>is a persistent false belief</u>:
A paranoiac has delusions of persecution. <a href="http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/illusion?s=t" target="_blank">Source</a></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="sectionlabel3"><span id="hotword"><span style="font-size: 8.0pt; font-weight: normal; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="cursor: default;"><br /></span></span></span></span></div>
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That’s right an illusion is a delusion and a delusion is a
persistent false belief. Wow. As I sit to write this my mind is going in 15,000
directions, well may be not that many but it is bouncing around a lot. Like
Tigger does - bouncy, bouncy, bouncy. But as I reflect on all the things that
are going on in life right now it only seems fitting. I have this illusion that
I can have a picture perfect life. My kids are perfect, my husband is perfect,
I’m at a perfect weight, I love my job, I love where I am, yada, yada, yada.
Right! Wake up Christy smell the coffee. I have this persistent false belief,
perception or idea that I can have it all. Not going to happen. I have to stop
this madness. This up and down that things are going to work, if I just work
hard and it, if I just read this book or that book. That everything will work
out like I have planned perfectly in my itty bitty mind, and then they don’t so
it sends me spiraling into pity party mayhem. If I just plan more things then
all of the sudden my family will go, oh yes I would love to spend time
together. I would love to have that special family night. Oh I want to show compassion,
empathy, love, comfort, etc towards one another. Oh please, can I? Sheez it ain’t
going to happen sista!</div>
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<br /></div>
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My family works better if we do our own thing. I have succumbed
to that realization. It isn’t an illusion it is fact. I need to find peace with
it and except it. We are not going to be the Walton’s or the Brady Bunch or
whatever. We are us. We are not “that” family we are us. We function apart just
fine and occasionally by some miracle intervention we come together for dinner,
or a movie or 5 minutes during advent. Then we go about other things. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It works, it’s not perfect, most will criticize
but it works. I just need to celebrate my 5 minutes here or my 15 minutes
there. Praise those times instead of wanting the illusion. I will probably be
happier for it. I want to be happy to have the Peace that the Lord wants me to have. To be joyful of his plan. May be instead of focusing of the illusion that's not going to happen I should be rejoicing in the plan that God has put forth in my life. It is right in front of me......seeing is believing. Rejoice. <i><span style="mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"></span></i></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-89039285054637470152013-12-09T13:32:00.004-08:002013-12-09T13:33:47.837-08:00I may not be......<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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I love to read. Always have. The thicker the book the
better, even when I was a little girl. In fact I tease Emily because she
doesn’t read anything over an inch and a half. I love all books, with the
exception of romance, but I tend to lean towards memoirs or auto/biographies.
Why? Because I can read those and go, “you know my life isn’t all that bad”.
It’s a reminder to me that my life doesn’t suck after all. </div>
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So when I stumbled onto a blogger that hasn’t posted in a
while it was a wakeup call to me once again that life doesn’t suck for me.</div>
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<br /></div>
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I may not be where I want to be right now but……</div>
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I have
a job</div>
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<br /></div>
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I may not be at the weight I want to be but……</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I have
my health</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I may not win the Mother of the Year award but…..</div>
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>My
children are doing amazingly well </div>
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<br /></div>
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I may not always agree with him but……</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>My
hubby is a wonderful man</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I may not feel like cooking every night but……..</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>We have
food in the pantry</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I may not have the cleanest and perfect house but…….</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Our
house is warm</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I may not have the newest and latest car but…..</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>My cars
are paid for</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I may not be where I want to be right now but…….</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I have
faith and trust in God that I will be soon.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 21.0pt; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: ArimoRegular; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">“Nothing taken for granted; everything received with gratitude;
everything passed on with grace.” </span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: ArimoRegular; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">~G. K. Chesterton</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-3455994185527520822013-11-26T05:00:00.000-08:002013-11-26T05:00:04.317-08:00A Frigid 1/2 Marathon.....<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghZlGxDO20mpE6tg9zlPdKdXl4E6eGqKbQxnvYZ3pOSYEV6rYK-vnPP5LtXOGXM6cUhCo8rKABWvi4YSZ5rKW_MmqHv1-m76PlK279-LB0muhl5y2l36bM_G_1rRR6cPfF64N38gMf41MK/s1600/IMG_20131124_111644_272.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghZlGxDO20mpE6tg9zlPdKdXl4E6eGqKbQxnvYZ3pOSYEV6rYK-vnPP5LtXOGXM6cUhCo8rKABWvi4YSZ5rKW_MmqHv1-m76PlK279-LB0muhl5y2l36bM_G_1rRR6cPfF64N38gMf41MK/s400/IMG_20131124_111644_272.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEil_0LMQPxeV7IhHbjjzWqns5SpexzG68PhaJJNmHuRuSDU6IZLPTmQrYKenlLFYoMtutnvoOpMxDAHanxVgT53n-_ExkyBXZ1pESIVhe1fGShrtSFWvcCQwsHqtxENb6UOvtRvrCW-g5gP/s1600/IMG_20131123_171503_303.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEil_0LMQPxeV7IhHbjjzWqns5SpexzG68PhaJJNmHuRuSDU6IZLPTmQrYKenlLFYoMtutnvoOpMxDAHanxVgT53n-_ExkyBXZ1pESIVhe1fGShrtSFWvcCQwsHqtxENb6UOvtRvrCW-g5gP/s320/IMG_20131123_171503_303.jpg" width="180" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjC9sLgx-oxCS3Cmn3lB2K_IMrbFx8cacWFsUvz52oT3ABxOhPgra_wWBtzvYDRA_kWqVWlcJesrzNAb4xONUJgavzqKH9Cvz4T3195yIVt8kn5adTO_4_TZ8OQ9z7LFKXsQIINCELT2cAV/s1600/IMG_20131125_152454_918.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjC9sLgx-oxCS3Cmn3lB2K_IMrbFx8cacWFsUvz52oT3ABxOhPgra_wWBtzvYDRA_kWqVWlcJesrzNAb4xONUJgavzqKH9Cvz4T3195yIVt8kn5adTO_4_TZ8OQ9z7LFKXsQIINCELT2cAV/s320/IMG_20131125_152454_918.jpg" width="320" /></a>So this past Sunday I ventured out in 22 degree temperatures to run another 1/2 marathon. My heart wasn't at all in this one but it eventually got there. Something about race day excitement that pulls most people into it. Anyway, this whole adventure started when a friend of mine set out to make it her first marathon. You see they give a pretty cool medal. And when it is your first it is even better. This was my medal from last year.<br />
<br />
I went to this race under trained and like I said not really wanting to do it and really really not wanting to do it after I saw the forecast. COLD, FRIGID COLD, like Alaska cold. In Oklahoma. But alas I had my own words thrown back at me "Suck it up buttercup". And off we went. It was a really uneventful race. They changed the course from what it was last year but it was still hilly!! I love hills though, I know I nuts, but really there is nothing like an accomplishment to see this big looming hill and know that you just ran up it. <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2RAUvWyldt-_th2eUjgETosDhx8lHJG_NNZaDTz5lquPyEhgsLoF3uedUk0wGI3JwSYo9bk2Bc4A5JOfyHjm8asW1ix_gkKuZ68QIYGYOn2qOaYz2j1NQAtpIVy9ItjN66cdZOqhnYngR/s1600/IMG_20131124_073127_571.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2RAUvWyldt-_th2eUjgETosDhx8lHJG_NNZaDTz5lquPyEhgsLoF3uedUk0wGI3JwSYo9bk2Bc4A5JOfyHjm8asW1ix_gkKuZ68QIYGYOn2qOaYz2j1NQAtpIVy9ItjN66cdZOqhnYngR/s320/IMG_20131124_073127_571.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEdMkeBDPl3cpnCC46LOrRX-R8GfR1L7ucrWFH6WeZeWFweHkhp3pzojHW8cMR0TwP6O989AyMLHgerPwGmootcshCosgxGidcd2ywATO0DM6jlJs3RSoxks5w3WaT2-qPZjzXeDKYLyVV/s1600/IMG_20131124_094631_569.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEdMkeBDPl3cpnCC46LOrRX-R8GfR1L7ucrWFH6WeZeWFweHkhp3pzojHW8cMR0TwP6O989AyMLHgerPwGmootcshCosgxGidcd2ywATO0DM6jlJs3RSoxks5w3WaT2-qPZjzXeDKYLyVV/s320/IMG_20131124_094631_569.jpg" width="320" /></a>These are the girls I started and finished with. I have ran along side these girls in the majority of my races for about 4 years now. The far one on the right, Becky, is a cancer survivor and I ran 18 races (number of Chemo weeks) for her last year ending with this race as a marathon. The girl 2nd from the left, Jessica, is her daughter and we ran all of those 18 races together. The girl on the far left, Christina, ran her first marathon back in April and we all ran with her but Becky, who unfortunately was sick due to a complication with her cancer.<br />
<br />
I don't have a picture of Gena or Jaimie who both ran their first marathon there Sunday but they are the only reason I went ahead with the plan to go. I was originally supposed to run it as a marathon but the lack of time to train told me I shouldn't. But I was able to be there for them both at the end.<br />
<br />
All in all it was a good race despite the cold weather. We pushed each other along and even today I don't feel as bad as I did. Of course the bling, bling didn't hurt either!!!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJK8qxtcdA_e-WmQ5-8IPLrcv_Ik-bCq0BvUeoSrm2Qfnf9PKK5UH09YUUzlK-ZFkF61JT32-7To2YZenb_hKAplR6P1r5PGhhTMLiV45bjEOEnTOkqcF0E2IJFXtYCii6tPmu_XMI0HoO/s1600/FB_IMG_13853353662212869.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJK8qxtcdA_e-WmQ5-8IPLrcv_Ik-bCq0BvUeoSrm2Qfnf9PKK5UH09YUUzlK-ZFkF61JT32-7To2YZenb_hKAplR6P1r5PGhhTMLiV45bjEOEnTOkqcF0E2IJFXtYCii6tPmu_XMI0HoO/s640/FB_IMG_13853353662212869.jpg" width="480" /></a></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-7778858190811632342013-11-25T13:21:00.000-08:002013-11-25T13:21:25.873-08:00One layer at a time.....<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggZP1xzsggD79Zgo2L3i7Z2kw6bSTiUMaWEwlZvRCy7ZpUU1a8OpcUmruxfRGpuxRJlLlBJWtrYnPuueUN_Qf_3ceuEIlsZtTb0unwq1sPA-p2GBcn0XpnPAO1aQj1FmwIdgfRxzO8x_SI/s1600/IMG_20131123_180549_806.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggZP1xzsggD79Zgo2L3i7Z2kw6bSTiUMaWEwlZvRCy7ZpUU1a8OpcUmruxfRGpuxRJlLlBJWtrYnPuueUN_Qf_3ceuEIlsZtTb0unwq1sPA-p2GBcn0XpnPAO1aQj1FmwIdgfRxzO8x_SI/s400/IMG_20131123_180549_806.jpg" width="225" /></a><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt;">I
am so not where I’m supposed to be. Do you ever have that feeling? I’m having
it constantly lately. I have a sense of urgency to create. I have these
creative ideas right now regarding remodeling our house, of crafting etc…..and
I feel like I have absolutely no time to do anything.</span></div>
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creative juices my talents and use them to give back. I have found several new
blogs (new to me) about women taking up the ole power tools and creative,
building and redecorating themselves. I find that I enjoy doing that too. Where
others hate to paint, I love it. I loved making the plank wall with my Dad. I
love tearing walls done and starting with a new slate. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt;">But
what can I do. I have an 8-5 job. Sure I’m working on paying bills down in
hopes to be able to leave this job. But is that smart with a daughter going to
college in less than four years? I don’t know. I think it would be cool to flip
houses. Don’t get me wrong, I know it would be a lot of hard work, frustrating
at times and all. But I think it would be so cool to see a project like that
from start to finish. Or even to help someone work on their home and the
happiness they would have after the project was complete.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt;">I
read a lot of different blogs. But I’m finding that some of the DIY blogs are
all about the latest and greatest trend. In fact I think some have even created
the trend. But I’m finding myself leaning towards the unusual. The use what you
go to make it look natural, funky, rustic, classic. I would so love a farm
house and everything right along with it. Are they dreams or should you make
them happen.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt;">Have
faith, step out, take a leap of faith….I can’t help but think of the scene in
Indian Jones Last Crusade where he takes a leap of faith and you don’t think
anything there but there is that path……</span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt;">oh how I wish I could take that leap of
faith and my path be there. Until then I will just continuing to peal back the layers......</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Book Antiqua","serif"; font-size: 8.0pt;"></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-66581655439787387492013-11-14T08:22:00.002-08:002013-11-14T08:22:51.467-08:00The scale rocked my world today<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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Things fell apart when I lost weight 5 years ago. I let the
world around me take over. I forgot who I was, where I came from, who loved me.
I fell hard. I almost lost everything. Since then it has been a constant
struggle with my relationships, with myself. I’m scared. I quickly gained
weight back that very year I hit my goal weight. I’m not quite sure how much
weight but I’m pretty sure at least 20 pounds, the next year 10 more and the
next, well you get the picture. And now 5 years later, I’m back to what I
started out at 6 years ago when I started that journey. Sure I’ve tried to lose
that weight every year. I start out with great ambition, knowing I’ve lost
before, believing that I will be able to do again. I get about 10-15 pounds in,
I hit the magical number of 180 (give or take a pound or two) and then I hit a
brick wall. It’s almost like my body knows and it puts the brakes on like a
screeching train going over the tracks. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Today I stepped on the scale, 211. My head started
screaming, my heart broke and even now as I sit to write this tears threaten to
come pouring out. Clothes don’t fit or those that I can actually squeeze into
bulge, and squeeze in places I don’t like. I sent a text to my hubby </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Me: “I
officially cannot fit into any of my pants”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Hubby:
“I am sorry. I have faith u will get thru it”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But instead of wallowing too much I have picked myself back
up. I reached for my “Made to Crave Devotional” and started reading again. I
had left off around Day 6 last month. So I’m going to do a brief “catch-up” and
continue forward.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I obviously need more
help with this than I have in the past and not from just a trainer either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve never really thought of Jesus helping me
through this but why wouldn’t he? Why wouldn’t he wants what is best for me? May
be I am still holding onto all of this and that if I just let it go and let it
be…..things will work.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So here is a recap (This is from the Made to Crave 60 Day
Devotional by <a href="http://lysaterkeurst.com/made-to-crave/" target="_blank">Lysa TerKeurst</a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u>Unsettled</u></b>
– oh I feel so unsettled right now. I feel like everything is out of control.
But allowing His touch to reach the deepest parts of me…..Goodbye to my
remnants, my justifications, shards, and tendencies. This is not who I am….nor
who I was created to be.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u>What if I let God
down? – </u></b><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">When I don’t have peace
physically, I don’t have peace spiritually. I can’t separate the two. Nor
should I</i>……never thought of it this way before. I have always thought of
them to be two separate entities not related, one not having anything to do
with the next. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u>The Right
Questions – </u></b>Define ourselves by our obedience not a number on the
scale. We are never supposed to get should satisfaction from our looks. Our
looks are temporary; if we hitch our souls to this fleeting pursuit, we’ll
quickly become disillusioned.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u>Consider It – </u></b>“Consider
it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds”
James 1:2 Every time we face this moment of temptation, or we are tempted to
stray from the commitment to make healthier choices, it’s a trail. We must
consider it! Our feelings may be a true indicator of what we are facing, but
they don’t need to dictate our decisions.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u>Blessings Ahead</u></b>
– The path of perseverance. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Perseverance
means having an urgency, firmness, resolve, and consistency. </i>Protection –
this trail may be shielding me from something in the future that I may not see:
provision – God is providing me with many things I never expected to come from
a trail; process- making lasting changes is a process. Gaining truth – and this
a biggy….gaining truth of who I am in Christ and how I am made for more than
this constant, self-defeating struggle.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><u>It’s All in the
Family – </u></b><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">We are only one good
choice away from being back on the path of perseverance. </i>God’s love never
fails, nothing can separate us from God’s love, love is patient, and God’s love
is not based on our performance. Food equals love, comfort and peace but food
cannot love back. How true that statement is. I find myself turning to food for
comfort, for love, for peace in times of tribulation. But it is only temporary
and soon turns to remorse or regret because I know what those chips and queso
will do. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’m going to pick back up now and try to write a little
something every day about this journey…..hope you can join along with me.</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-78927466961012179672013-11-08T08:22:00.002-08:002013-11-08T08:23:07.389-08:00Living ConsciouslyI want to consciously live my life. I’m a reactor by nature. I sometimes react before I think, shocker I know. But I’m not so happy about it. Sometimes I feel remorse, sometimes I don’t. But I so wish I was one that didn’t react. That just sat in the back, observing, listening…..so I’ve been thinking how I can better approach my life in this way?
<i> </i><br />
<br />
<i>Conscience - the inner sense of what is right or wrong in one's conduct or motives, impelling one toward right action; self-knowledge; the complex of ethical and moral principles that controls or inhibits the actions or thoughts of an individual. </i><br />
<br />
<i>con•sci•en•tious - controlled by or done according to one's inner sense of what is right; governed by conscience; careful and painstaking; particular; meticulous; scrupulous: conscientious application to the work at hand. </i><br />
<br />
<i>dil•i•gence - constant and earnest effort to accomplish what is undertaken; persistent exertion of body or mind</i> <a href="http://www.dictionary.com/"></a> <a href="http://www.dictionary.com/" target="_blank">source</a><br />
<br />
One would hope we make conscience decisions every day. One would hope, I would hope. But as I look back over situations I find that I haven’t. How could I say I have when I’m back to almost my highest weight? Again, like a broken record. I don’t consciously choose to eat better at a restaurant. Instead you eat a whole basket of chips by yourself and then wonder why you weigh what you do.<br />
<br />
There are so many things you could apply being conscience to. Making a conscience effort to choose your attitude, to be nice to someone, to make someone smile, to pray, to do _______.<br />
<br />
I never really looked at it this way. You could say that everything you do in life day in and day out needs to be a conscious decision. Impelling one toward right action. A lot of what we do daily is unconscious, second nature and that is fine. But the important stuff, the life changing stuff needs to be conscientious. Praying, food choices, exercising, attitude to yourself and others…..you catch my drift.<br />
<br />
So as I sit and drink my tea looking out the window at the fall day, maybe I can consciously make decisions. Well I will make a conscious effort each and every day…..baby steps my friend.
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-3885398966518456442013-10-24T08:48:00.006-07:002013-10-24T08:48:59.822-07:00Like a reactor.....<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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Okay, I’m an official slacker. No really I just plain
forgot, got busy etc. It has been a weird few days. But I’m just going to plow
ahead. My heart feels heavy today and I’m sure it has to do with a multitude of
things. </div>
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For starters on Monday I felt crappy, stayed home and just
rested and piddled around. Tuesday, Emily had a band contest that I was a bus
sponsor on. Done it before and have enjoyed it. But this time it just didn’t
seem right. I mean the band did great; Jim got to go watch her, which was good.
But there was one thing right after the other. And to feel unappreciated,
treated like a child and chaos…..ugh. As some of you know I’m a reactor. I tend
to react before I should, say things before thinking them through and most of
the time react before I get all the info. I try so hard not to be this way. To
sit back and get all information but like I said it is a weird time right now.
After the band performed the get a “debrief” and things got confusing of who is
on what bus, when they are leaving etc. Then to be told by the Vice President
of the booster club to not talk while the band director talks so we don’t
disturbed the kids in a tone like you would a child, was the last straw. I didn’t
lose my temper although in an email the following day she said tempers where
lost (I’m going on the pretense she meant herself) but I still reacted instead
of just waiting. I wasn’t the only one that felt belittled by her reaction. But
had I waited it probably would have been better. Again the whole day was chaos…..I’m
a reactor, a fixer, a resolver. </div>
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Yesterday wasn’t much better. I had Elliott’s IEP at school
to change his category from not only DD (developmental delay) but to add the
suspected Austism for the Asperger’s. Of course with all the issues going on
with his teacher and not agreeing with her, the inconsistencies of
communication, and the lack of communication I was a donkey on the edge. I didn’t
explode but I spoke my mind and in the process…..made the teacher cry. Thing is
I feel bad but I don’t. My gut tells me this teacher is a fit for him although
or psychologist says she think she is good for him but more than likely we won’t
like her. And that is probably true. But I had to get off my chest of the
things we were experiencing that were contradicting what was supposed to be
happening. I’m not going to go into detail. Nothing changed I just got to speak
my mind and I tried to do it with as much respect as I could. But I still
reacted. I apologized to them was told it was good to let them know how I was
feeling and even the psychologist for the school said never to apologize for
anything when it comes to being an advocate for Elliott. But still, I reacted.</div>
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<br /></div>
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But last night I didn’t react. When Jim got upset over a
situation before church, I didn’t react. I was quite. I let him rant and speak
his mind and then simply said….you can’t control people and their actions. You
can’t make them conform to yours. I’m sorry they don’t show the respect you
think you deserve (and probably does). Then I remained silent. And you know
what? He was calm when he got home where before they might have been tense. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And today…..things are going alright. I don’t want to be at
work or at least not this work that I’m doing right now. Last night I finished
decorating for Halloween (yes I know it is in a week) and you know what I
ENJOYED IT!!! I love decorating my house being creative. I miss not taking the
time to be creative. And I need to take them time to be that. I read an article
in the Parade this past Sunday about how people are reverting back to handmade
crafts and having a creative outlet. I need to tape back into that. Problem is
I have so many things I like to do that I just can’t narrow it down to just
one. But I think I need to react to this outlet of creativity. I need to react
to things I enjoy and let the rest fall to the way side……</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-83068665125951724342013-10-17T12:15:00.001-07:002013-10-17T12:15:27.336-07:00A Second Chance<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-T55gKF1t5TduCCOK8TqSlCLYV7vKKiZ31fPCDfOttbbGVeSwRnGD3-T3yGSczSJy5BfzLQ286XaLOv_esAaJU_I9pt-6DO-IuC-t64DgxOcB6ELqZW4Glt80kAVwCyLSj1LRog7hi1j-/s1600/IMG_20130529_195326_890.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" esa="true" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-T55gKF1t5TduCCOK8TqSlCLYV7vKKiZ31fPCDfOttbbGVeSwRnGD3-T3yGSczSJy5BfzLQ286XaLOv_esAaJU_I9pt-6DO-IuC-t64DgxOcB6ELqZW4Glt80kAVwCyLSj1LRog7hi1j-/s400/IMG_20130529_195326_890.jpg" width="225" /></a></div>
<br />
I have had my fair lot of second chances. Even my marriage is a second chance. This is our second marriage for both of us and we have been married almost 16 years now (together almost 19). So I would say that was a good second chance. Heck there are even things that warrant a third and forth second chance. Even Maggie got a second chance of another family.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgal3MbqBrTI-ZMFGvaPHh8Gza7Ywh6NrX-CovDZOytktTVoonWkYF2erzUcNfJ_OYawrmWrOO77H8Z794-h-DVLU5kVY3HW7qkK7IXWBjGnEkvHQM8NLA4teUtcKsPcRxKm5VFhMTG5GAb/s1600/IMG_20130803_170011_492.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="112" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgal3MbqBrTI-ZMFGvaPHh8Gza7Ywh6NrX-CovDZOytktTVoonWkYF2erzUcNfJ_OYawrmWrOO77H8Z794-h-DVLU5kVY3HW7qkK7IXWBjGnEkvHQM8NLA4teUtcKsPcRxKm5VFhMTG5GAb/s200/IMG_20130803_170011_492.jpg" width="200" /></a><br />
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There are some things in life that you can't do over but you can improve on. And there are somethings you can't get back or a second chance or a do over. And that is time. Time with the family, time with your children, experiencing their firsts, seconds, etc. Watching the band practice for the umpteenth time. All important milestones. You don't get many second chances.....<br />
<br />
It is important to me more and more every day that I be there for my kids in every way I can be. I feel a strong urgency to do so. But it always hasn't been the case. I've been pretty selfish in my life even when it comes to my kids and my hubby. That has all changed recently. And as we take steps to change somethings in our family life I'm realizing more and more, its okay not to do those things I once was so passionate about. I'm not saying not to go out and be your own person, do your own thing. I'm just not going to go out for every thing that I was did. I guess you could say my passions have changed. Half of me is disappointed and half of me is excited for this journey in our life.<br />
<br />
Some of you know that our son has Asperger's and ADHD. Next week his IEP changes at school to include the Autism Spectrum. Meeting him you wouldn't think he is anything other than a high spirited little boy. And for the most part he is as well as an exceptional story teller. But you don't get to see everything we do. Its our normal and it almost comes second nature to us. He is so much a joy and blessing and finally we have a new team of doctors helping us. Just the other day I was thinking how blessed we are to have them in our lives, especially our one physiologist. Because we are getting a second chance as a family. She is helping us with our perspective of Elliott, how we should work with the school system (instead of being defensive, Mom), how we should change the way we do somethings at home that will not only benefit Elliott but all of us.<br />
<br />
My level of expectation is high, like it is with most things in life. I need to learn how to relax that level and enjoy the process and ride. But it is hard. So when she told us to establish weekly dinners again, my mind starting spinning with all the family things I want to do and expect. It didn't go as talked, as planned but it was a step in the right direction. I'm so looking forward to the changes we are making, to the second chances of being the best family we can possibly be and I don't want to miss a thing.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-5793658873429751032013-10-15T08:45:00.002-07:002013-10-15T08:45:39.447-07:00The 15th day of Opportunities<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-CoKZtIsSzGs/Ulna4RlRqII/AAAAAAAABX0/rdMoqBoyi-0/s1600/IMG_20131012_171518_874.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-CoKZtIsSzGs/Ulna4RlRqII/AAAAAAAABX0/rdMoqBoyi-0/s400/IMG_20131012_171518_874.jpg" width="225" /></a></div>
The month is half way through. I don't know if you are like me but it doesn't seem possible does it? 70 days until Christmas which means 77 days until the end of the year. Wow! Of course right now I'm excited that we only have about two weeks of marching band left. Now don't get me wrong, I thoroughly enjoying the time but it will be nice to have that slow down a little. I know she is thinking the same thing too. <br />
<br />
I sit and reflect a little about how this 31 day challenge is going. Well, I'm about average I think. There are somethings that I've been working on and some that need some more work. But hey, aren't we always a work in progress?<br />
<br />
Today I start in a support group with a wonderful group of women. Some I've known for many, many years and some not as long. The point of the group is not only weight loss but to support each other. It is more like an improvement group because not all women need to lose weight but may be they have other areas in their live that they need to improve on and just need that little bit of encouragement. I started the group, created a Facebook page and posted before pics. I've never posted before pics of myself. I've taken them but never shared them outside my hubby. I didn't like what I saw.<br />
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So here I go again. Back on the road to improve myself. I'm not new to this. I know what to do and what not to do. I do have will power when I want to and I am a stress eater when I want to be. I have struggles with my weight, my image for as long as I remember. I want to stop this back and forth, to and fro I do. I know the risks, I see it in my family. I'm a witness to their arthritis, there heart issues, their blood pressure issue, their medication. I know. Yet, I go through this almost every year. I try real hard, do real good for a while and then something happens and I walk away. I give in to temptation, I have excuses, I bend the rules. I find easy.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-lx01PjN7Kivl-m_ROZlfkRRIj8sTSsbuzRaLL1VbLZRYXtR9iMs1oznINsCt_oL7ygqpHEsEfjFpKlTyH40WOnvMSGmUs1mtSIK9Sc99yANhp98C1JHERhZyYt4ZqZh2ob7w4ke3YRC1/s1600/IMG_20131012_172613_490.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-lx01PjN7Kivl-m_ROZlfkRRIj8sTSsbuzRaLL1VbLZRYXtR9iMs1oznINsCt_oL7ygqpHEsEfjFpKlTyH40WOnvMSGmUs1mtSIK9Sc99yANhp98C1JHERhZyYt4ZqZh2ob7w4ke3YRC1/s400/IMG_20131012_172613_490.jpg" width="225" /></a></div>
This journey is no different than any other journey. Everything takes
work. Marriage, parenting, outside jobs, spiritual walk and even weight
loss. I am and always have been a determined person. I'm not sure why I struggle so with my weight, my self image. It isn't something I want to pass along to my daughter, although I see her struggle as well. It isn't something I want to dwell about all the time. I want it to be natural. I want it to be self accepting. <br />
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I have this opportunity to lead a group of women that do not judge me for my flaws. They accept me, they encourage me. We support each other through various issues in our lives. We have each others back. Today I'm going to embrace a gift God has given me. For the next four months we will each work on our own area, rather it be weight loss or not. I have short term goals and long term goals. I also would like to go ahead and get my personal training certification. Something I've always wanted. Something I'm good at, like to do. I find joy in encouraging others and I know I'm pretty good at it. So I will try in December. And who knows what type of opportunity that will bring my way.<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-39139810940800410912013-10-15T06:49:00.003-07:002013-10-15T06:49:51.548-07:00A Few Days of Opportunities<div dir="ltr">
Well I owe you a few days of posts. I meant to post a picture a day but that didn't quite workout that way. There was So here is a recap of days 11-13....</div>
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Beautiful ain't it. We have gone camping the last several years. Rather it be in a tent, trailer, RV or cabin. This year we went to Robber's Cave in Southeastern Oklahoma. This wasn't our first choice but it was closed due to the government shut down. Although the trip had a few bumps in the beginning we ended up having a great time.<br />
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It was a wonderful time that went a little too fast. I wished I would have had one more day. But I will take the days I had. Being somewhat unplugged (sorry for no post). Getting to see all the stars, sit around the camp fire, go exploring and just listening to my kids talk and play.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbCQGvbR5wAjV_EIGuhJvy2GVonVOBL2tSwz9LrsSe5L7luCGOTZLNV-nrSF0rXIIJYriSjl_lAEBNahUFRlg8t_I3cY6R-m8L0VsHn2Lyo_d2KE-qCLcQl6Kj-JxX74sAvzBG2HWaqzAK/s1600/IMG_20131012_163637_065.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbCQGvbR5wAjV_EIGuhJvy2GVonVOBL2tSwz9LrsSe5L7luCGOTZLNV-nrSF0rXIIJYriSjl_lAEBNahUFRlg8t_I3cY6R-m8L0VsHn2Lyo_d2KE-qCLcQl6Kj-JxX74sAvzBG2HWaqzAK/s320/IMG_20131012_163637_065.jpg" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjadXswUuf-TIECw9zwMmh1Z7Ro1A3RJ-iNqDUjZFf4bR5WuxGDm650lt7SuPbgKJdaq0KZJrenLb9S19OHEPBGyrngiftVIqza1_v1B_XUDLxYJ2bYgs3I7yrYbNKfcRN1XmgDlLjP0KkN/s1600/IMG_20131012_152634_474.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjadXswUuf-TIECw9zwMmh1Z7Ro1A3RJ-iNqDUjZFf4bR5WuxGDm650lt7SuPbgKJdaq0KZJrenLb9S19OHEPBGyrngiftVIqza1_v1B_XUDLxYJ2bYgs3I7yrYbNKfcRN1XmgDlLjP0KkN/s320/IMG_20131012_152634_474.jpg" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCLmYrteMUpkRXqg3WLm1RaxXg1DiZbGiP3OzyzYSr5K2TIse2HUKgeERT8_0skhR0030ZMZgRZ-3Tlsd7CsUAaTRey7m7UStDCKF_fhatCoZh-OwlMXBSTp9ZXkqxUq1Jl-fjItk74tWK/s1600/IMG_20131011_082959_702.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCLmYrteMUpkRXqg3WLm1RaxXg1DiZbGiP3OzyzYSr5K2TIse2HUKgeERT8_0skhR0030ZMZgRZ-3Tlsd7CsUAaTRey7m7UStDCKF_fhatCoZh-OwlMXBSTp9ZXkqxUq1Jl-fjItk74tWK/s320/IMG_20131011_082959_702.jpg" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWwlbyjYr-fI4HEuEtMIziNYKGel9MQYDAjGIzJLZyuuzGPtV1JcrM3qZPuyFfcSCuOiNZVyU8R2-Z6senF-fpKH4pOS9XVO-hkTIhuCcZziR9AFZvshBbZxReXV7uiw9Uox7TdEMvD8-l/s1600/IMG_20131009_134645_203.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWwlbyjYr-fI4HEuEtMIziNYKGel9MQYDAjGIzJLZyuuzGPtV1JcrM3qZPuyFfcSCuOiNZVyU8R2-Z6senF-fpKH4pOS9XVO-hkTIhuCcZziR9AFZvshBbZxReXV7uiw9Uox7TdEMvD8-l/s320/IMG_20131009_134645_203.jpg" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-88958294974197679922013-10-10T17:00:00.001-07:002013-10-10T17:00:36.305-07:00Picture Perfect Day 9&10<p dir=ltr>This is what we have been doing......</p>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpY-YiB7ffgtt3rrGTlCe06q6vXe6vQu_mz7GXhODxcXpWYjfRXotOW7WXmWve237JdegiDpbHlrw52pzio2qW11o0JB8Ke_QYf8K56lLVynr9pBGT4Q-vMXb8w2DEg4EFaBpsRyA6PPeT/s1600/IMG_20131010_184337_191.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpY-YiB7ffgtt3rrGTlCe06q6vXe6vQu_mz7GXhODxcXpWYjfRXotOW7WXmWve237JdegiDpbHlrw52pzio2qW11o0JB8Ke_QYf8K56lLVynr9pBGT4Q-vMXb8w2DEg4EFaBpsRyA6PPeT/s640/IMG_20131010_184337_191.jpg"> </a> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ8lqY3H1tDEY0D1P0o0qktBFL7tdj5oK-ei0EsbRnEs7YP_VhbaT6KSup5mv8_8GIb-pbVEzXiQBjyXQXqQ6-KL5SBherFiWJexuugowA6I7ClfHL1Y-wQxBJXqm0o1xb-_xM0tk4TXMC/s1600/IMG_20131009_125755_857.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ8lqY3H1tDEY0D1P0o0qktBFL7tdj5oK-ei0EsbRnEs7YP_VhbaT6KSup5mv8_8GIb-pbVEzXiQBjyXQXqQ6-KL5SBherFiWJexuugowA6I7ClfHL1Y-wQxBJXqm0o1xb-_xM0tk4TXMC/s640/IMG_20131009_125755_857.jpg"> </a> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjs74zgv1V-S-tEmB1Ql-uSKEUEYBJJG8X0zc7lPg-yqRtR7GKzevNOWppUDO4lYw7RWk4hKtKoUgQZYZ08tqFvaTE9tng1hCgbE73U-QtsqmK0Lpq2-zzVNYuz0Y0UAh684ndyFt_Yjcc9/s1600/IMG_20131009_132555_160.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjs74zgv1V-S-tEmB1Ql-uSKEUEYBJJG8X0zc7lPg-yqRtR7GKzevNOWppUDO4lYw7RWk4hKtKoUgQZYZ08tqFvaTE9tng1hCgbE73U-QtsqmK0Lpq2-zzVNYuz0Y0UAh684ndyFt_Yjcc9/s640/IMG_20131009_132555_160.jpg"> </a> </div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-3036632626815273592013-10-08T08:31:00.003-07:002013-10-08T08:31:36.703-07:00Should haves......<i>“Understand this my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry” </i>James1:19<br />
<br />
I wish I had seen this earlier……I woke up angry though. Well that might not be true. I went to bed upset, had weird dreams and really didn’t wake up in a good mood. But I could have changed it. I could have choose to work through the situations instead I got upset. I didn’t react to people, I just reacted and it turned a situation that was already tense into a tenser situation. And you know what the reason why I got upset ended up being okay in the end.<br />
<br />
I've always been a reactor although over time I've gotten a lot better. As I've gotten older I've yearned to be that quite little woman that didn't speak her mind, show her emotions, etc. Nope not me. I'm opinionated, aggressive, passionate, you name it. But I have found myself lately, waiting. Not always but more and more. Waiting and silent. Its new for me and even I'm shocked by it.<br />
<br />
Like Saturday at Emily's band contest, typically I would be all over every where butting into conversations being the center. But not Saturday. No I did a lot of standing, watching, listening, reflecting on conversations. I helped when needed but for the most part I was just there. Now I did do my fair of talking but I never really started conversations and never interrupted conversations either. And I liked it. I was calm and relaxed. I was there for my daughter. I got to experience it all instead of being stressed over a conversation or this or that.<br />
<br />
And even today as I look back on yeseterdays events and even when our dog ate Emily's band shoes, she was calm. Not to say she doesn't get worked up either. She was calm. And I so admire her for that. I should have taken a lesson from her and remained calm. To take the scripture as is. Quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to get angry. And may be I wouldn't be so stressed. I so want to be less stressed about situations.<br />
<br />
I want to learn how to use my passion for the better. To have words to share with meaning in good and bad situations. And I know starting the day with the good book can help with that immensely. I should have checked my email on my phone first to get my scripture. I should have......<br />
<br />
And I should have posted this yesterday, slacker! Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-91990926859030544712013-10-07T07:21:00.001-07:002013-10-07T07:22:39.146-07:00Ketchup Day 5 and 6<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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Okay so today is going to be a "ketchup" day. I
slacked over the weekend. Too much, too much. But let me give you a replay of
what happened. Not say I didn't have good excuses. Probably the main excuse was
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<br /></div>
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Saturday, day 5 was spent like this:</div>
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My daughter is a freshman in her first year of marching
band. We did good. Placed third in our division for prelims and 8 in the
finals. Not bad for a band that is heavy with freshman this year. This was
probably by far the best experience of the weekend. A very long weekend but I
wouldn't change anything about it except for her not feeling good. There is a
time prior to them going over for warmups where their director gets them in
focus. This was the first time I witnessed it fully. He plays music, talks them
through a visualization routine and then they get their plums in their hats
prior to going over. No one talks during this time. The kids have a mixture of
excitement, fear, focus......such an intense time. You can just feel all their
emotions. I found myself right there with them every step of the way. And then
both times they took the field I found myself tearing up. Not sure why. This
isn't Emily's first or last performance. Probably just so very proud of her. Of
her accomplishments. And so very moved that she wants me there. That is the
icing on the cake. She seeks me out between times, wanting to be there. Its
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Sunday, day 6 was spent like this:</div>
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She didn't play keeper this time but you get the picture that we had a soccer game. And if I had thought about it some more I would have not had her play. We didn't get in until 2:00 am and it was a 12:30 game. Plus with her not feeling good it doesn't make a good mixture. But the team did good and placed second overall in the tournament.<br />
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The rest of the day was spent running errands, grocery shopping and preparing for our camping trip. By last night I was exhausted but still didn't end up sleeping well. Oh well, two more days then we are on our trip. Hopefully, I will be able to get some rest.</div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-2644768570400823452013-10-04T08:56:00.002-07:002013-10-04T08:56:34.209-07:00I'm not serious right nowI get daily verses from Air One Radio Station. Today it was from Colossians 3:23 <i>“Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people.” </i>Gasp! Swallow hard. It is like the verse is talking straight to me. I’ve been goofing off at work. Not taking my tasks seriously, not really taking my job seriously as well. Sounds horrible considering so many are furloughed right now doesn’t it? It’s not that I don’t like my job or where I work because I do. Like most jobs it has its pros and cons. Just right now, I don’t want to be here. I don’t want to work. I want to be home to take care of my family and home. That’s where my heart really wants to be.
And so I don’t put 100% into my job. Fleeting away are the dreams and aspirations of being a project manager, having a title and making lots of money. Well maybe just money because I work for a municipality and let’s face it, I ain’t going to get rich here. Some would say but both your kids are in school all day, whatever would you do? I would just be there for them if they needed me. I would take care of my house. I would just be a Mom.
Years ago when I was in the military, I had a friend that was making sure I was staying on the correct path. At the time I was married to a jerk, no kids, and very young. Anyway, we were talking and discussing future plans. At the time I thought I wanted to be a veterinarian, live in a log cabin on acreage somewhere. But during the bus ride from base to our hotel he said, what if your destiny was just to be a Mom? I don’t remember much more of the conversation other than thinking, “Are you crazy” that’s plain dumb, that isn’t a career, that isn’t much of a job.”
Fast forward even 5, 10 or 15 years later after obtaining two degrees, getting remarried, having two kids, you would hear me saying, “I’m super woman, I can do it all. Have a career and raise a family”. You know those women. Like Diane Keaton in <i>“Baby Boom”</i> where she is heavy into herself and her career only to find after taking guardianship of a little girl, that being a Mom is just as important. Love that movie.
But now I’m not so much into the career. And really the last month or so I’ve really felt the pull not to be here at work and to be at home. Right now, financially it doesn’t make sense but 8-10 months from now it might just be doable. May be that’s why I feel the need to simplify, reduce spending, save more, etc. even so much to be taking “Financial Peace” at church. I just want to have the opportunity to be there for my kids when they get home from school.
Until then I need to work willingly at this job in this particular season of life. Until the next season unfolds. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-38920921398170315212013-10-03T09:35:00.001-07:002013-10-03T09:40:01.560-07:00Disaster Adverted…….Barely<span xmlns=''><p>Whew what a morning. I thought it was going to be a douser but it ended up being okay. Not the best but I know it could have been a lot worse, A LOT WORSE. I did not win Mommy of the year this morning either but I regained composure quickly.<br /></p><p>The morning didn't start out bad, I mean I woke up like most mornings not wanting to get out of bed. The dog lying next to me wondering why my alarm is going off for the umpteen time, shuffling down the hall to wake up the teenager who ignored her alarm, dogs out, coffee started, etc, all normal. He even got up in a good mood and continued even when Emily yelled at us to hurry up. We took her to school (she has to be there at zero dark thirty for band practice, not really 6:30 but it is dark). And then we came back home and that is where it started to digress. <br /></p><p>Being an aspie (aka Aspergers) kid he has difficulty transitioning and this morning was a morning that he didn't want to deviate from what he was doing, watching UTube videos on Minecraft, on my phone. Yeah, A+ Mom. Anyway, I asked him repeatedly to get dressed (yes I let him stay in his PJs while we take sissy to school, no biggie) and he started whining….you have to help me. So like any rational Mother I went and got his clothes and started helping him get dressed. This is when it started. Since he wasn't paying attention, I grabbed my phone and turned off the video. Since it has a password on it (thanks to him sneaking out at night to get it and watch videos) he couldn't get it back on. Things began to get frustrating but manageable. Then I made a vital error in dealing with him. I tried to rush him. <br /></p><p>Yep! He becomes a ticking time bomb. The crying, the screaming, the kicking etc. I could feel my blood pressure rising quickly. So like any good Mommy, I tossed his shoes and walked out of the room. Which intensified his mood. I went about gathering my things, his backpack and finally told him, we needed to leave. Another explosion occurred because he realized he was using up his playing time at school. <br /></p><p>Fast forward into the kitchen, still yelling, screaming, throwing himself around, pushing chairs, etc. I just about lost it. I became angry with him. Asking him "why are you doing this" of course he yelled back at me it was because he was missing play time, it was all my fault. Then I heard the voice. Use this as an opportunity. SO I felt myself relax and told him to go to his room. That is what our physiologist wants us to do with him. Send him to his room when he is uncontrollable. I didn't place him there long, just long enough to put my stuff in the car then I went back in. He had turned his TV on and was acting like it wasn't any big deal until I asked him to come on lets go, calmly. Then the emotions started again. <br /></p><p>We got to school, he locked the door refusing to get out so I grabbed his backpack and sat on the bench, waiting. He came out, head butted me on the side and after a few seconds proceeded to go in where the morning continued to go downhill because two little monsters decided to take all the blocks even though three can play to a tub….Elliott broke down again. There would have been a time in the past that I would have scooped him up and walked out but today I let him sit there crying, even though it broke my heart. I tried to redirect him to something else but he wouldn't have it. Finally he picked up the remaining three blocks to play with and that is when I told those kids to give them some of theirs, the block hogs. <br /></p><p>Now this all sounds like it too forever and it didn't. Really it was a total of 10-15 minutes from the first outburst until the time I got him inside school (we live a block away). He didn't give me a hug or kiss just his head for me to give a kiss on. But he did come to the window and wave to me as I pulled away feeling like the worst Mommy on earth. <br /></p><p>I know he can't help it. And to others he looks like a big baby when he gets upset at that. If they only knew right? But it doesn't help my emotions at the time. It doesn't help me feel any better that I almost lost it this morning. It doesn't help that I was harsh with my words to him. It's just Elliott being Elliott. My normal not anyone else's. <br /></p><p>I turned out of the school and headed straight for Starbucks for my Chai Latte, texted his teacher about his mood and said a little prayer for him. This morning ended up turning for the better. <br /></p></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-25489150881685388572013-10-02T14:48:00.002-07:002013-10-02T14:49:39.061-07:00Turning a feeling of failure into an OpportunityI’m not doing so good in the take an opportunity category. Day 2 and I feel like a failure already. I woke up with a sense of “I’m going to conquer” the day and although the day isn’t quite over, I have made a few mistakes. You see about five years ago I lost about 50 pounds. And since those five years, I have almost gained every pound back. Today I’m the closest to it I have ever been. I’ve been asking myself, when is enough going to be enough. I’ve done this once or twice before. I know what it takes. Weight lifting/working out has been a passion of mine that I always return to and have for a long time…. say almost 20 years worth, geez. Almost 20 years ago around this time of year would have been the first time that I got serious about my weight loss. See may be this is an opportunity. Let’s see where this takes us shall we.
The year is 1994. I’m stationed in Germany at Spangdahlem Air Base as an Airman First Class, 81st Fighter Squadron, working in the tool crib instead of out on the flight line. Married to a jerk, whom we won’t mention because that is a whole other post. We had just returned from coming stateside on vacation. I was overweight (I really don’t remember what I weighed), depressed, etc. I started working out at the base gym, taking step aerobics and working with a personal trainer who just happened to be the step instructor. I worked out probably 1-2 hours almost every day…..watched what I ate, etc. I befriended my trainer and a two other women in the same boat as I. By the following spring I had lost weight, again I don’t remember what I weighed, but I remember people telling me I had. I remember buying new clothes. By the fall of 1995, I looked goooooood! I gained confidence that I had let my soon to be ex-husband rob me of. By the winter of 1995, I was probably the smallest I have ever been (circa high school) lifted weights, taught step aerobics, danced and just enjoyed life. By the spring of 1996, I was separated from soon to be ex-husband all the while maintaining my weight. I even competed in a body building competition in the fall of 1996. Time marched on got divorced, fall in love with hubby, got engaged, moved back to the states, got married. All the while maintaining my weight, working out here and there. And then I had baby #1. From then on it has been a constant struggle. A constant yo-yo of the scale. Last year about this time I was hovering around the 200s and managed to drop back down to 190s. Up and down. Like an escalator that has no stopping point.It took me almost 8 years from baby #1 to put up the fight. I don’t want to wait another 8 years.
So this morning I jumped on the scale, I’m at 206 pounds. 5 years ago I was 160. But I took the opportunity not to let the scale define me. Not to let me clothes define me. Not to let the way other women look at me (or judge me…..even if they don’t that’s the way I feel) define me. So I started my day. After I drop the kiddos off at school I stop for coffee. I even turned today like I was going to stop a Starbucks’ because I needed a Chai Latte, I needed the creaminess, the warmth, the yumminess. But at the intersection I turned and headed to Oncue (gas station here in Oklahoma) and got a regular coffee. Two high fives for that one….because it cost less and not as many calories. I even ate the greek yogurt I brought. I was going to seize the opportunity of weighing more than I should to jump start my weight loss. Then lunch time came. Panera happened and let’s just say I’ve ate my fair share of carbs today.
And now as I sit drinking my green tea kicking myself for the shortbread pumpkin cookie, the baguette and the mac-n-cheese, I still feel like seizing the opportunity to get it in gear. This is not me and I know it. I have let excuses and situations dictate what I do with me. I have let a craving smother my will power. And instead of turning to God at those times of sadness, stress, desperation…..I have turned toward Dr Pepper, Chai Lattes, Mac-n-Cheese, Queso and Chips, even alcohol (I like me some wine). I have made excuses not to run, not to get on the elliptical and even not to lift. I don’t need a book to follow, no I could probably write one. I know what needs to be done.
So I give myself this challenge, this opportunity to stand up for myself again. To lose 50 pounds in 8 months. That is approximately 5 pounds per month. Very doable, I’ve done it before remember.
I’ve never been a quitter. In fact I’m usually a pretty determined woman. That is what my hubby fell in love with. And By George I think I will seize the opportunity to be determined again.
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-82812569344983889632013-10-01T08:00:00.002-07:002013-10-01T08:00:49.543-07:00And the journey begins.......Day 1, I feel like I’m starting an epic journey. A journey through space….na not really, I just like the dramatic theme song playing in my head. No I’m just normal ole’ me. So, day 1 of this link up. I’m not quite sure how I’m going to work this. Rather I’m going to be posting at night or in the morning. Rather I write about the current day or the past day. I’m a good organizer, planner but sometimes my follow through is something left to be desired. I get my inspiration from various places. So if you are here with me on this journey be prepared for randomness, rambling, or anything else I decide to throw out.
I thought I would make a list of things I want to work on and then use those topics to discuss the opportunities. But first where did I come up with a title of opportunities. I actually stole it from my director at work. He says “that every day is an opportunity”. There is always an opportunity to learn and if you sit back and observe you can find those opportunities. Some are more apparent than others, some you have to work at and some you don’t realize happen until afterwards. All are great gifts and should be cherished and pondered on.
1. Following Financial Peace Program – I’m currently taking the 9 week class. We are
on week 3…..starting to do the cash flow budget. So I’m hoping after
our camping trip next week, I can start applying more of the concepts. We have
already put plans in place for savings and snow balling debt.
2. Quite time with Jesus/Daily Devotions – never really have been good with this but
have always had the desire to do so more consistently.
3. Read more books – I’ve been saying for a good long time now how I wanted to get rid
of the cable box. With following #1 more that really may happen. But I really want
to carve more time out to read.
4. Get back into my workout regimen. I really have fallen off the “band wagon” so to
speak. Ever since this summer when it got too hot and I used that as an excuse to
not run…..things just fell apart from there. But last night I worked out with my BFF
and the desire is flickering again.
5. Eating – get a grip. Has a lot to relate to #4 again feel off the “band wagon” and
seemed not to care but the shame, guilt, flicker that enough is enough is happening
so…..
6. Date night with hubby. Something that we used to do at least once a week but kiddos
schedule, babysitting issues etc it hasn’t happened. And we need it.
7. Find my path…..I feel like I’m to do more. That I’m not actually following the path
I should.
So there it is, somewhat of a plan for the next 31 days. I’m sure there will be more things that I will discuss but these are the thoughts that are swimming in my head. I’m hoping by writing these down I can look back on them and truly delve into them. I have some busy times this month so hopefully I can still find the time to slow down in the process and really think, ponder, pray and wait. For I know He has grand plans for me. That’s really my goal here, finding my path, re-evaluating not only my life but my family’s life. What is important to me, to them and to Jesus. I’ve spent too many years doing and living how I think others want me to live like. Now is the time to live like He wants me to, like the way I need to for me and my family. Isn’t it exciting? A journey with a few bumps in the road but a journey that I will not be alone on.
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-12268702382064804172013-09-30T13:32:00.002-07:002013-09-30T13:33:02.853-07:00New Season is Here..........Fall is my favorite time of the year, probably because my birthday is the first day of fall. But seriously, who doesn’t like the crispness of a morning breeze, the trees turning orange and red, even the air just smells like fall right? You know I’m right. And of course who can’t forget football. We pay attention just a little bit more this year since Emily is in marching band. However I don’t think we will convert hubby. Oh well.
We are preparing for our fall camping trip. Just 8 days away, geez, already? And this is the first time I have ever heard my hubby said he is actually looking forward to it. Now this isn’t to say he isn’t in full on get everything ready and prepare mode. But I’m used to that. Don’t tell him, but I’m actually looking forward to it too. Four nights and almost 5 days of being away from home, being away from a schedule, being away from most electronics, just being away with the family, very much needed break. With the exception of one year, we have done something for fall break the last 5 years. Tent camping, RV camping, trailer camping, and a cabin. But this year instead of worrying about borrowing someone’s trailer and the expense we have with that, we thought we would just tent camp. The area we are going is beautiful no matter what time of year but I’m hoping the leaves are beginning to change. We are starting to see cool mornings and rain….two things that are needed so we shall see. We haven’t spent time in this area since Elliott was 2 so I’m looking forward to hiking this time around. Or just sitting and reading. That is a treat in itself.
Tomorrow marks the first day of a challenge I’m going to do called “31 Days”. Of course this is going to be a challenge next week. Since I don’t have to do long entries, I might either try to schedule some to post or just do a picture post of things we are doing…… Anyway, we are supposed to pick a category to link to. Family Life, Inspirational & Faith, Health, Wellness & Food, Personal Endeavors or Too Awesome to Categorize are some of what I’m looking at hooking up to. I’m thinking of a title of 31 days of opportunities or 31 days of improvement. I’m thinking of topics of change, ways to improve my life as well as my family’s life. So more than likely I will do Personal Endeavors or Too Awesome to Categorize.
This is a challenge but one I think will open doors, or at least just a journal of rambling thoughts. You never know what they may lead to. So I hope you will join me as this new season begins……
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-33141372900717561672013-09-19T08:26:00.000-07:002013-09-19T08:26:22.262-07:00I am who I am.......so kiss it society!Show up as you are not as you think you ought to be…I read this somewhere I don’t remember. So I apologize if you are reading this and I “borrowed” it from you. How many of us struggle with this concept? The just “ifs” in life. “If I had done so and so then I would be a” or “if I would just lose weight I could”…..you know who you are. I don’t think there is a single person out there that hasn’t said this before. Hmm, raise your hand I know you have! I know I sure have almost each and every day. Well may be not every day but probably pretty close to that. Especially right now as I struggle with weight gain again. “If I would just lose “x” pounds then I would be so happy”. Would I? I’m not so sure any more. I mean what would I gain? My hubby loves me for who I am now, today at this very moment. Believe me, I ask him ALL THE TIME! And his answer “more than you know”. That’s probably true. My kids love their Mama unconditionally. My God loves me, this I know. Side note, that song will be in your head all day now, you’re welcome. My real friends except me for who I am and those that judge me, well I don’t need that criticism in my life so who cares. But I do, you know I do.
I am who I am at this moment. Aren’t we supposed to live in the moment? At least I try to, I want to. I remember when I was dating this guy back in high school. We dated for like 2 years or so. Anyway, I remember on a walk one night he said, “I think you are a homely beautiful”. What exactly does that mean? I don’t know why I remember that. By definition homely means <i>lacking in physical attractiveness; not beautiful; unattractive: a homely child; not having elegance, refinement, or cultivation; proper or suited to the home or to ordinary domestic life; plain; unpretentious: homely food: commonly seen or known </i>(<a href="http://www.dictionary.com">www.dictionary.com</a>). Geez, what a terrific guy right? Anyway, I don’t think he quite meant it that way. May be I’m not the most elegant, refined, cultivated woman out there in this highly cultivated overrated world but I beat I have my strengths that make me beautiful in other ways right? Why does our culture raise us makes us believe that we have to have the outward appearance to be beautiful. Why do people look at you and judge you simply on your outward appearance without knowing one iota about you? Such a struggle for so many.
But I’m tired of living by current society standards. You know there are standards. You have to live in a certain place, have a certain job, etc etc…..If you weren’t popular in high school chances are you won’t be popular in life now. Right? I call shenanigans on that. I might not live in an expensive house by hearing last night from a teenage girl that “my home was welcoming” made all the hard work that we have put into it worth it.
I am who I am at this moment but it doesn’t mean I can’t change, I can’t improve. I always say there is room to improve. This philosophy can be applied to anything in life. I am changing, improving, in some areas more than others. And I will strive to continue to improve but I want it to be God’s doing not society. I want to live by his standards not those that society deems. And that my friends is a challenge on itself. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17641655714977442146noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5031299430518249823.post-16848499138448831792013-09-18T09:00:00.000-07:002013-09-18T09:00:05.239-07:00Scattered Brain FoolToday I feel like a scattered brain fool. I cannot focus on anything at work. I don’t even want to be here. I want to be home taking care of my home. I just feel like I’m not supposed to be where I am right now. Some would say I’m crazy because I have a wonderful job and yes I do. There are a lot of “pros” to my job and I should be thankful that I do have income in a world that so many don’t. Be lately there has just been such a nagging feeling that won’t leave. I don’t dread to come to work but I’m not the same as I once was here. May be it’s that time of year I don’t know. I can’t believe we are already half way through September. Geez! Would the world please slow down. Then again maybe that’s the lesson that I need to slow down, that our family needs to slow down.
Life seems so overwhelming at times. There is so much to do so little time, so many things that I have an interest in. How do you or can you fit it all in? Some would say, why don’t you prioritize? What is important to you? Things of importance seem to change like the seasons don’t you think? I used to think that the most important thing was my running and working out. Although it is important and it has fallen to the way side, I just don’t have the passion to get out there and run a marathon (done that twice) or even run for long distances at all. Most of my friends are training for their next race, signing up for the next race, making plans for that next race. And yet I find myself going, eh. All of working out has fallen to the way side. And it has been at the expense of my weight. I’ve gained. I’m back over 200 pounds, not much over but enough were I don’t like it. This needs to change.
But where do I fit it in? Our family life seems to revolve around our kids, more like Emily. I couldn’t image if Elliott would have played sports. Uuuweee buddy. I need to prioritize working out for me though. It makes me feel better.
Here are things that are important to me or things that have been on my mind. The first three are in priority order the remaining are just there for the most part.
1. Developing my relationship with Jesus
2. My husband
3. My kids
4. Working on the House
5. Living Simply
6. Reading
7. Other Hobbies
8. Friends
9. Working Out
10. Volunteering
Why do I have such a sense of wanting to be home? Why can’t I concentrate on work? UGH!
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