Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Sacrifies are good!

Sacrifice, goals and life seem all to go hand in hand. If you are a planner, like I am, you plan out details, you do your research, you make a log or detailed plan all expecting for it go like it should. Then life happens.
I have been doing (aka “racing”) since 2008 when I got the bug. Usually every year I do several events, some years more some years less. Last year I trained for a half ironman distance race, so I think in total I did 8 events. This year I pledged to do 18 races with my friend in honor of her mother who is an ovarian cancer survivor.  I decided at the beginning of the year that I wasn’t going to do any long triathlons; in fact all of the duathlons/triathlons with the exception of one were to be done as a team. I had every intention on completing one Olympic triathlon by myself, I even wrote my training plan for it, got all pumped up for it (mostly talking myself into the fact that I had to swim again) and then things started falling apart.
Really they started falling apart prior to this but I was kidding myself that I could handle everything. Well guess what boys and girls, this girl was drowning quickly. Everything became a struggle. Something had to give. I’m not going to go in too much detail on here what has happened lately. Let’s just leave it is we have had to make some alternative child care arrangements because of some coping issues with my Monkey Boy. Things in my life right now are revolving more around him and family than me. That makes me sound like a selfish person in the past and probably to some my life seemed to be more on the selfish side. Don’t get me wrong, I love my children and husband tremendously but for too long I thought what made me and defined me is my accomplishments or certain type of accomplishments. I thought, and have a hard time with not thinking that I would be liked unless I did certain things. Totally not true and if people think less of me because I’m changing priorities than I don’t give a rats booty, really I’m too old and life is too short to give care what people think. But I still struggle with it.
So get to the point, really? The point is, I’m taking a step back from racing and training hard. I’m still going to complete the 18 races that I pledged; we have about 6 to go. I’m not going to do the individual triathlon, even though I could possibly do the sprint. Training for three events is just too much for me right now. And in all honesty I’m so okay with that. I like triathlons, I like duathlons but I’ve been enjoying lifting weights again. I’ve been enjoying just running although I am going to get back on my bike again to add some cross training. But I can get to the gym to lift, I can get out and run, I can even get on the trainer with my bike. I can get things done before work or at lunch time, leaving the evenings for family time. And even if we do go to the gym it is short/sweet and Monkey Boy can hang in the child watch some.
I’m actually excited, relaxed, relieved etc about this next phase in my life. I think it is only going to be good for our family, good for monkey boy and good for me too! I still have my goals for a healthy lifestyle; I still have strength goals so that isn’t going away. I’m just making scarifies to better me and my family’s lifestyle. I’m hoping as well to blog more. Just more to get the jumbled thoughts out of my mind than anything, but keeping my blog going is something I’ve always wanted to do just haven’t always made it a priority. Also my blog might be a mesh of a lot of things so take it or leave it!

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